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Times Turn 23

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 )                                                                         (
(                             NewOrigins Events                             )
 )                            December, Year 2                             (
(                                                                           )
 )       A few scouts have heard about a conflict between combatants       (
(     happened in the desert of Hulir where 126 combatants were killed.     )
 )    Powerful magic was used in the battle. Fearsome magical monsters     (
(         were collecting their prey. The attackers slaughtered all         )
 )    defenders. This battle will be known as Battle near the ocean of     (
(                              Atlantis Ocean.                              )
 )                                                                         (
(                          .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                          )
 )                                                                         (
(     Several traders are whispering about an encounter between enemies     )
 )     happened in the desert of Moxsan where 1 combatant was killed.      (
(       The attackers slaughtered all defenders. This battle will be        )
 )            known as Battle near the ocean of Atlantis Ocean.            (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )     Some traders are discussing about an encounter between hostile      (
(       forces happened in the swamps of Haucan where 1 combatant was       )
 )    killed. The attackers slaughtered all defenders. This battle will    (
(           be known as Battle near the ocean of Atlantis Ocean.            )
 )                                                                         (
(                          .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                          )
 )                                                                         (
(        A few druids are worried about the skirmish between enemies        )
 )     happened in the desert of Moxsan where 1 combatant was killed.      (
(       The attackers slaughtered all defenders. This battle will be        )
 )            known as Battle near the ocean of Atlantis Ocean.            (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )    Multiple pilgrims have heard about a conflict between two armies     (
(     happened in the desert of Moxsan where 23 combatants were killed.     )
 )      The attackers slaughtered all defenders. This battle will be       (
(             known as Battle near the ocean of Atlantis Ocean.             )
 )                                                                         (
(                          .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                          )
 )                                                                         (
(     Numerous traders are discussing about the village of Swormorkbank     )
 )    that lies in the Chiarslai underforests, where a faction expelled    (
(                                  guards.                                  )
 )                                                                         (
(                          .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                          )
 )                                                                         (
(     Numerous travelers are rumoring about the city of Niewensand that     )
 )    lies in the Chrastnasest desert, where a rebels murdered guards.     (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )    Several peasants are whispering about the city of Acheckpest that    (
(      lies in the Hetdasos caverns, where an opposition tried to cast      )
 )                    out guards but were unsuccessful.                    (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )      Many travelers are discussing about rangers who have murdered      (
(      Swamp Creatures (226) near ocean of Atlantis Ocean. Freeing the      )
 )                  swamps of Gollmin from their terror.                   (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )    Dozen wanderers are whispering about witchers who have destroyed     (
(     Kobold Pack (2337) near forests of Junkoheim. Freeing the forests     )
 )                      of Starath from their terror.                      (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )    Some peasants have heard about hunters who have killed Wolf Pack     (
(      (890) near forests of Junkoheim. Freeing the forests of Wardcot      )
 )                           from their anxiety.                           (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )    Dozen adventurers have heard about adventurers who have massacred    (
(     Swamp Creatures (2757) near ocean of Atlantis Ocean. Freeing the      )
 )                  swamps of Sinzid from their anxiety.                   (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )     In the jungles of Pefda, near forests of Pulishaw, Clan of Wild     (
(        Men (161) who continue to cause fear to local inhabitants.         )
 )                                                                         (
(                          .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                          )
 )                                                                         (
(       In the tunnels of Dosford, near ocean of The Undersea, Giant        )
 )    Lizards (500) who continue to cause horror to local inhabitants.     (
(                                                                           )
 )                         .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                         (
(                                                                           )
 )     In the chasms of O'eonggend, near ocean of The Undersea, Demons     (
(          (3123) who continue to cause fear to local inhabitants.          )
 )                                                                         (
(                          .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.                          )
 )                                                                         (
(       In the chasms of Miopifrun, near ocean of The Undersea, Devil       )
 )        (912) who continue to cause terror to local inhabitants.         (
(__       _       _       _       _       _       _       _       _       __)
    '-._.-' (___ _) '-._.-' '-._.-' )     ( '-._.-' '-._.-' (__ _ ) '-._.-'
            ( _ __)                (_     _)                (_ ___)
            (__  _)                 '-._.-'                 (___ _)
            '-._.-'                                         '-._.-'

Quests

In the desert of Chrastnasest lurks the Evil Mages (632). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
Build a Temple in Allswirnan for the glory of the Gods.
Seek a token of the Ancient Ones legacy amongst the ironwood of Illford.
In the tundra of Speibucfolk roams the Kobold Pack (282). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the tunnels of Dosford lurks the Evil Warriors (709). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
Seek a token of the Ancient Ones legacy amongst the herbs of Wichy'om.
Build a Temple in A'ynch for the glory of the Gods.
In the chasm of Avashe roams the Dragon (478). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
Build a Temple in Ca'a for the glory of the Gods.
In the cavern of Grasaust roams the Pack of Rats (905). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the swamp of Kebirstul lurks the Undead (608). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the tundra of Mygec lurks the Cloud Giant (674). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the swamp of Perchviaped roams the Wolf Pack (318). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the underforest of Hesscot lurks the Dragon (984). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
Build a Temple in Ascan for the glory of the Gods.
In the jungle of Stenlut lurks the Great Apes (1833). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the cavern of Pincung roams the Pack of Rats (476). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
In the forest of Loibawo lurks the Kobold Pack (610). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!
Seek a token of the Ancient Ones legacy amongst the stone of Slegladdes.
In the underforest of Miorlriras roams the Troll Pack (479). Free the world from this menace and be rewarded!

Articles

Things are heating up in the central latitudes of the easter realms. Will war come soon?
Testy McTestface (101)
It is time to expand. Without the burden of having so many executive officers, we are free to increase our production capabilities. Defenses will come easily now.
Legacy of Disasters (106)
We need money again...
Darlocks (107)
I've heard whispers of assassins targeting mages! Who would commit such heinous crimes?
Thornhaven (108)
Life is to short!
MMF (113)
More mosters!
Sunspear (117)
First days of winter. Nothing happens.
Kroll Empire (123)
Time! time...? time. :)
Faction (124)
Oh, the hard work of coming up for new useless texts about this swamp, just to make a living through som shady newletter noone's reading anyway. It just doesn't make sense!
Disencharmed (125)
The streets of the city are full with new people. Once dull and almost abandoned the taverns are getting ready to see the quests.

Dwarves are expecting the new guests.
"We are used to drow and orcs and some occasional gnomes but today we say the hybrid of he horse and human. They call themself ktarus". Really?

Let's not hear out all the theories dwarves had about the origination of the centaurus as a specie.
Dwarves were quite particular on some details of this genetic experiments.  
Night Watch (127)
Ishmael, it is time to come out of the shadows. It is time to wake up from the current life!
Seanchan (132)
There is a band of wanderers, with no maps and no destination, and no purpose other than the journey, They are roaming about the country.  When they find their way blocked by guards, they simply choose a different path, and hope not to offend anyone with their presence.
Sylva Sylvarum (134)
Landed in the plains...
Mansergh (135)
The undead are dead. The skeletons are bone soup. Now that our troops are up to the task of handling wandering marauders, it's time to turn the tables and go wandering ourselves.
Them (15)
The infinite sea is beginning to create a factionwide anger at gods and at those more lucky than us. If we finally find reasonable land, it is possible that the local inhabitants will suffer this anger, but they have only gods to blame.
Lords of the Sky (16)
"What news from the north?"
   "Our men are tired and cold"
"I needed you to tell me this?"
Kiiran (17)
Well now.. that is interesting.. I am hearing rumors of epic betrayals, or else epic failures of coordination.  Not sure which, but should be interesting to find out!
Atlanteans of Yore (19)
Need more silver!
Crooked Hooves (20)
Things are getting messy. Who would have thought alliances are kicking in? Time to hide.
Punkers (22)
"With the success of our chocolate trade route: it would be nice to find somewhere to buy pearls."
The Grey Order (23)
Wolves.
The Wolves of Isengard (25)
Heresy has penetrated the northern lands! He needs to do something urgently. a pitiful handful of armored aliens, at the head of an enemy army, became an unpleasant surprise for the followers of the Church. Despondency struck the believers... He preached today! He called for the accumulation of strength for a Great Ritual, he promised victory, he encouraged and appealed to the power of Faith. He was convincing! But his own doubts haunted him. His people didn't have time...
Church of The Holy Deed (26)
Lets try to catch a lich, lets get magic treasures
Friendly people (27)
Island discovered in the north
Rainbow Falcons (29)
If you encounter one of my units or are denied entrance in a region by me, please contact me by game message.
The Merry Magicians (3)
At least no one is attacking us, right?
Dogs of war (31)
We knew it could be worse and we were right.
Three (33)
underground is really scary !
Silver Hand (36)
The audience at Pafe is tougher than the Stenbay folks. It may be the cold.
Babylon (37)
The underworld continues to suck the lives of our clansmen, lacking silver and with unending monsters, it is unlikely the scouting force will survive the ordeal.
Clan McTavish (38)
Roads construction is started. FInally.
WindMasters (39)
There will be a day - there will be food.
Gyperboreya (4)
So the map is more or less explored and it is already clear that there are three continents connected by narrow isthmuses, separated by three large seas. It's time to give the continents names. I will call the mainland where I found my lands a "Povitan". The continent to the southwest of it will be called - "Ostobia". above it will be "Gnesintaro"
Danado (40)
The jungles were infested with wild men again. Some soldiers had slacked off their guarding duties and let creatures wander in from nearby ruins.
The general decided to put a positive spin on this. "Soldiers, it is the deliberate policy for us to farm the weaker creatures of this land! We will wait for them to arrive, and take their silver and weapons!"
Hopefully the soldiers would believe this and not grumble at having to collect random javelins from corpses when they had perfectly good swords.
The Children of the Four Winds (41)
The undead are finally over. It 's even a pity )
SkyRaiders (46)
From the diary of Gale Swifthands

We had a busy month. We have defeated the city guards in Mostad and Lotla'o. Our ambassador has been killed in Ceracttown along with the guards who came to his aid. The culprit is faction 9. I suspect that our representative in Stuswephham will have the same fate. I wonder if there will be any independent cities left on the surface by January.
We are facing a real bottleneck with our studies. Even with the two new meteorological balloons we just don't have enough lab equipment to satisfy the needs of 14 mages. Either we turn back home or we'll be standing in line to use the 6 labs we currently have. The girls and I are cozy enough to share one bedroom but sharing a lab would be a really bad idea. We have enough Disasters aboard the fleet already.
Sticky Hands (48)
Pioneers - the first steps into a bright future! 🗺️
Maybe...
Dark League (5)
What are all these Quests in The Times and why aren't there any near me?
Brown Bread (50)
[Searches beyond the edge].
Tyranny (51)
"Join the army they .."

"Belt it, we've all heard that before, and we're sick of it."
Greywolf (52)
Being in the middle of the map is nice, but what does the future hold.
Mantzikert (53)
This month, some of our people witnessed how City Guards were mistaken for Monsters and wiped out.
And all this without any use of magic!
We still have a lot to learn...
Iron Dwarves (54)
Fishes live in the water, fishes go into nets, fishes change to silver, fishes are good ish 
Kragers Klowns (58)
we were drunk, sorry. better luck next world.
Drunken Dwarves (59)
November, Year 2

Silence and darkness...

- Malagor
The Order of Obsidian Shadow (6)
Sitting in my tower, reading the news.
Not a lot of gossip in these parts when you think about it
XOT (60)
The Underworld is full of monsters, better bring an army down there
Malibu West (62)
Mages are studying hard.  It's hard to work in a building site. Half-completed buildings here and there and some ones just completed.  Some are rushing from building to building looking for a quiet corner of their own.  Some find an empty place just vacated by another.  One who eats a lot of garlic, and who, apparently, is too busy too wash.  Maybe, one day, things will settle down.  But classes in the basics have started... 
Rurikids (65)
How bad can an article be, and still get the silver?
Fon (69)
Ed celebrates his ((Celebrant)) celebrates ((something)) Atlantis Times format.  Sure, there aren't any enduring stories.  Sure, there isn't any character development anyone could ever care about.  Sure, there isn't an opportunity for Celebrants to show off their grammar skills while ridiculing their fellow Celebrants.  Sure, there aren't any cookies.  Wait, Ed thinks, I'm not so sure about the "no cookies" part.  I like cookies.  Hmm.  I don't think I get to do things anymore, I don't even get to eat things anymore, I just get to grant wishes.  I wonder whether I could make some living celebrant wish for cookies?  Probably not.  Loopholes like that would have been figured out by now.  All the old races are immune to such manipulation unless they were already thinking it on their own.  The Celebrant goblins, orcs, and gnolls are too smart for that, and the other old Celebrant races are too happy to wish for anything to be different.  When the cold comes, they will cheerfully sing about freezing.  If only there were an unintelligent, unhappy orphan somewhere.  But not many Celebrants have died, that's why I'm still all alone in this Elder business.  Oh, well.  No cookies for me.  At least I can celebrate my fantastic format for Celebrant Times articles.

Bangs celebrates the lives of City Guard 86 of Ojou.  Driven off by well armed Shadow Pirates (and their Militias), bold City Guard 86 had the courage to rally, return and fight again.  City Guard 86 has for almost 24 months protected every citizen of Ojou from taxation, and, even though Guard 86 knew they faced pirates better armed than they, and militias more numerous than they, rallied and returned to fight one more time to protect the citizen of Ojou from taxation for one more month.  Bold City Guard 86, the citizens of Ojou shall miss you when you are gone.

Silver celebrates a lone Clan scout, who seems to have played some subtle role in convincing the pirates to neither plunder nor tax the independent freemen of Ojou.  If the City Guard are worthy of celebration for suicidally rallying when they knew themselves outnumbered, then that lone scout also somehow seems celebration worthy for protecting the freemen from taxation for the one month the guard were busy rallying their demoralized members.  Or was it two months?  It would be nice if the proud freemen of Ojou could escape taxation (or pillage) for a third month, and have a full 2 years of freedom before falling under the shadow.  Is this possible?

Cristata Proteles celebrates dialogue.  Again.  The gnoll Celebrants consider themselves the true intellectuals of the Celebrants.  Celebrant orcs and goblins argue with the gnolls about this, each thinking that their own libraries are better than the gnoll libraries.  Celebrant gnolls maintain an extensive library of past Atlantis Times articles, which articles they study and argue about in their youth to develop their ability to make other Celebrants feel stupid.  Cristata Proteles observes that back in April, somehow Celebrants published a Times article that was more like dialogue than like Ed's required ((Celebrant)) celebrates ((something)) format.  Cristata despises Ed's format.  Cristata Proteles suspects April's article could not have been published were Ed were really the only Celebrant elder.  Cristata thinks she has discovered evidence of another, secret elder.  This elder must usually be suppressed by Ed, perhaps in the usual manner in which senior vampires suppress junior ones.  But the evidence Cristata remembers, and that she has checked in the library, suggests that somehow this suppressed secret elder was able to exert influence in April to change the format of a published Celebrant Times article.  Well, either that, or else Entertains Ice's evil spirits really exist, and the evil spirits modified the article.  But Entertains Ice is a human, what could Entertains Ice possibly know?  Cristata knows that humans aren't good for anything.  And Cristata is a gnoll.  She's smart.

Gardenia, gnomish poet, celebrates AABB head rhyme.  In the poetry of Revenge of the Cone, last month we learned three factions of poets joined in the (AABB) Pinecone Pantheon Alliterative Alliance.

Ipiro Redo, wood elf poet, celebrates AAA head rhyme.  In the poetry of Revenge of the Cone, last month we learned three factions of poets joined in the (AAA) Pinecone Pantheon Partnership.

Ugot Uru, goblin poet, celebrates AABBBB head rhyme.  In the poetry of Borophaginae Chasmaporthetes (ugly poetry, because gnolls have no souls), Borophaginae wrote "students study farming, forestry, feasibility, failure and the fur trade."  Ugot Uru thinks "and the fur trade" also contributes to the soulless gnollish ugliness, but she can't find anything in the grand goblin library that explains this.  There is, in the GG library, anyway, no mention of AABBBBCDBE head rhyme, that last B isn't supposed to contribute to the overall ugliness of the poem.

Thitathi celebrates ranks and titles.  Or anything else that would let her compete with other Celebrants.  She could, she supposes, get one of the Celebrant swords that seem to be everywhere these days and compete in Celebrant sword tournaments, but what fun is that?  No one anywhere in this world seems to be interested in fighting, and anyway, the orcs and gnolls win all the tournaments.  Maybe their libraries (which they keep to themselves) let them always win?  Maybe they have secret books that read "lie with your first blow, as the enemy withdraws, time perfectly two belly blows?"  Anyway, swordfights with orcs and gnolls are no more fun than verbal arguments with goblins, orcs, or gnolls, they always make you feel stupid.  Better to just make beautiful things.  Orcs and gnolls can't make beautiful things, because orcs and gnolls have no souls.  Goblins do have souls; why goblins can both be smart and also make beautiful thinks is a mystery no elf understands.  Are goblins bad with swords because goblins can make beauty? Or are goblins bad with swords because goblins are small?  And why are goblins grammarians good linguists?  It's a mystery.  Anyway, Thitathi looks forward to ranks and titles.  Maybe she can outrank the smart orcs and gnolls even if she can't out fight them.  The male elves (and male gnomes, and all the other males) have decided they don't want a king, they want a lot of grand poobah's instead.  Thitathi doesn't care about that.  All Thitathi cares about is how our QUEEN shall be chosen, and how that choice can be Thitathi.

Nawiri celebrates Celebrant wood.  Growing tall, cleaning the air, living.  Nawiri celebrates the absence of metal and fire in Celebrant lands.

Withdraws Honest Hammers celebrates Celebrant iron.  Celebrant ingots hammered into Celebrant swords, edges tempered in Celebrant fire and Celebrant oil.

Shares Armors would like to celebrate ascii art comics, but Shares Armors doesn't see any ascii art comics yet.  Aren't the elders supposed to grant wishes?  What good is an elder who does not grant wishes?  Shares Armors knows his wish wasn't granted because he is human, and the elders never grant humans anything.  Shares Armor wishes the Celebrants had a human elder.  Then human wishes would be granted.

Ssslitherss Sstonefissh celebrates boredom.  Peace continues on every front.  Messages of amity are exchanged across every well honored border.  Trade and information exchange abound.  It seems inconceivable that any faction would ever attack another, or even delay their scouts.  Ssslitherss wonders why the elders bothered to invent so many kinds of weapons, and so many kinds of armor, when clearly no faction anywhere has any interest in weapons or armor.  Every faction everywhere is peacefully studying and slowly and steadily building up our economies, while easily reaching agreement with neighbors about who shall build where, and who shall study what.  Ssslitherss is glad that our world has no wars. 

Ashuray celebrates living in an uncivilized backwater.  The farthest explorers have finally reached land (bigger than little islands) far beyond our ring of land, and the far explorers report that, unlike our ring, the lands beyond are lousy with cities.  On the ring, we have mostly towns and villages, but in the lands beyond the ring, there are numerous cities, tropical cities, voting cities.  Ashuray is glad that we are in an uncivilized backwater, and not out among those many civilized cities far from the ring.  Ashuray does wonder, though, why the ring is so densely populated.  If there are so few cities here, why did so many of us start here?  And why did everyone stay, instead of teleporting away to the richer lands far from our uncivilized backwater ring?

Cristata Proteles celebrates the death of Ed.  Now Ed hasn't died recently, but Cristata Proteles, tired to tears of trite ((Celebrant)) celebrates ((something)) articles, really, really, really wants a new format with dialogue between Celebrants instead of Ed's dreary celebrations.  If Ed has to die (again?) to make the Atlantis Times a little more interesting, Ed's should just make the sacrifice, Cristata will celebrate it.  And discuss it.  Definitely discuss it.  Maybe even argue about it.  And make the old happy races feel stupid.  If Ed dies (again?), Cristata believes Ed's sacrifice will allow the Celebrants to stop celebrating and start discussing.  Die, Ed, Die.

Leneli Ume celebrates Atlantis Times rumors.  There were two rumors last month, and Leneli enjoyed both of them.  Leneli likes the fact that rumors are not paid for, so she doesn't have to skip over any crass "need money" rumors. Rumors, unlike articles, are written from the heart.  Leneli likes rumors written from the heart.

Assassinates Herbs celebrates the heartlessness of all but two of you.

Gives Marsh Grain celebrates cookies.  Gives Marsh Grain doesn't have any libraries, like the gnolls, orcs, and goblins do.  Gives Marsh Grain can't even read.  But she remembers, before her mother died, her mother reading the Atlantis Times to her each month.  Gives Marsh Grain remembers that one month her mother read to her a short and very unusual Celebrant Times article.  That article wasn't about celebrations, it was about something mysterious, some word Gives Marsh Grain had never heard before or since.  "Cookies".  Gives Marsh Grain wonders what a cookie is?  Gives Marsh Grain wonders whether a cookie is a thing that can be made?  Gives Marsh Grain wonders whether SHE could make a cookie.  Almost certainly not, Gives Marsh Grain thinks, the elder races all tell us that humans aren't good for anything.  Besides, Gives Marsh Grain is not only human, but also stupid and uneducated with no home or status.  Gives Marsh Grain wishes she could make a cookie.  If wishes were fishes, maybe she could make cookies out of fish?
celebrants (7)
We hear strange noises coming from the underworld.
The Filras (8)
This city offers WINE and PERFume. Who could guess that local jokers will mix them up?
Some drows were found drunk and unfit for battles after tasting this 'perfine'.
What should we with such an inexperienced army?
Drow (82)
Please do not occupy our hunting grounds.
Monster hunters (85)
We will try again and again.
Yet Another Faction (9)
We get back on our feet.
Paykiss (92)
L'opération "Giants Birds" s'est couronnées avec succès... malgré quelques pertes minimes nous avons reçu une belle récompense :
11 magic crossbows [MXBO], 9 magic wagons [MWAG], 666 silver [SILV].
Maintenant que cette région a été libérée, nous allons pouvoir l'exploiter.
BientĂ´t, ce sera le tour des villes et du dragon qui rode
The Lands Kepper (93)
Fine. I'm tired of waiting!
Tailenders (97)

Rumors

Swift no more!

Bounty for the hands belonging Gale Swifthands.  

The rest of his treacherous dregs can be put to the blade.
There is a rumour that the CATO alliance is actually....

The TACO alliance. 
They have the chicken, the salsa, the lettuce and overflowing with sauce.

They are currently short on a wrapping alliance member, so we thought we could add a rap for you.

I grab a taco, fill it with flavor, no dread,
On the death of Brown Bread, that's where I'm fed,
Plains and Forest, my army is bled,
In the world of Atlantis, I'm always ahead.
They are Borgs!
Drunken Dwarves "accidentally" (on purpose) murder their allies Order of Shadows.
Will they be forgiven?
Some factions said untrue things in the Times last month.
The Order of Obsidian Shadow has said untrue things in the Times.